The truth is we don’t have absolute control over our existence. Life itself has already demonstrated that we have never had 100 percent control over our existence. Not being in control is not being inactive. It is about knowing deep down that we are not in complete control and about knowing deep down that we should open our heart and learn not to react to disappointment with anger, resistance and confusion.

Life is not always in accordance with our expectations and desires. Our expectations and desires are very much part of our ego structure. We can work to change our perceptions so we see all conditions in life as blessings. Surrendering is giving up the delusion that we are in control or the desire to be in control of everything… As a human being, we know when we are not surrendering to the way things are. We know when we are resisting the way things are. We feel it in our body. We feel our whole system beginning to contract. We are reacting to life. When I recite the phrase, “I surrender to the way things are,” my consciousness shifts. This beautiful phrase reminds me that I am not in control. It helps me to surrender and shift from being contracted to being more expansive, more joyful, and in a happier state of consciousness.” 

--  Anam Thubten Rinpoche